


you mumbled it into your pillow (i heard you loud and clear)

by azureforest



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Soen no Kiseki/Akatsuki no Megami | Fire Emblem Path of Radiance/Radiant Dawn
Genre: "what are we", Alternate Universe - College/University, Confessions, Domestic Fluff, M/M, Pillow & Blanket Forts, Pillow Talk, Roommates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-30
Updated: 2016-08-30
Packaged: 2018-08-12 01:01:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7914265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/azureforest/pseuds/azureforest
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>it's all pillow-talk, of course, but they both mean every word they say, every glance they cast the other way.</p><p>(or: everything has to change, but nothing really has to change, either.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	you mumbled it into your pillow (i heard you loud and clear)

They’d settled into an oddly pleasant rhythm ever since they decided to share a dorm just between the two- Leonardo would wake up early, make breakfast as Edward drags himself out of bed with a smile, the very image of a morning person, talking away as they both sit down, the blond doing his best to blink the sleep out of his eyes, downing a cup of strong tea to help him shake off the drowsiness. Their subjects drift- Today’s plans, the music from the radio Leonardo left on, the odd dream Edward had, whatever came to mind, up until one of them has to leave, the blond to his college classes, the brunet to his job at the local café.

Lunch together is a rarer affair, since both them are usually out, unless it’s the weekend, so Leonardo cooks again, spaghetti, soup, simple things, but nice things they both appreciate- They leave the TV running despite Leonardo’s protests every time, and Edward keeps getting distracted while eating, but they have a good laugh depending on whatever cartoon is on at the moment, and all is good.

However, Edward cooks dinner- At least, whenever he’s in decent enough shape to do so, otherwise, it’s instant noodles and/or pizza- He might be a bit experimental with dishes, but they turn out decent half the time, and delicious the other half- Enough to make Leonardo hum in delight, blue eyes widening as he does so, the chef beaming as he sees the expression on his friend’s face. Dinner’s quieter, both of them are a bit exhausted, but the silence that would be filled with either the din from the TV or the music pouring from the radio is now filled with quiet conversation, recounting their days and cracking bad jokes, maybe on occasion memories or just soft appreciation, a comfortable hum of conversation, or an equally comfortable pause in it.

(It’s this that lets them feels most at ease- There’s nothing that softly whispers ‘home’ like seeing eachother’s faces again.)

They do their laundry together, race around the house with mops to see who can clean faster and better, wait impatiently with foot-tapping and mock frustration when one of them is using the bathroom, the shower, the shampoo and soaps, mix up their toothbrushes because for some reason, they got the exact same ones. They make their beds, build pillow forts, stay up late playing video games or marathoning movies. Sometimes Edward falls asleep to the sound of Leonardo typing away at an essay, because the telltale tapping tells of his presence, an oddly comforting lull of monotony. And sometimes Leonardo stays up late not because of homework, but because Edward is out late and he won’t let himself sleep until he’s seen his friend home safely- All of this was the usual, the natural thing for them to do, and it never occurred to them that this might be a bit too familiar, despite their friends frequently insisting that they’re like a married couple.

(Perhaps they want that, but perhaps they’re scared.)

Because yes, they bicker, but they always make up, usually about small things whose turn it has been to do the laundry or Edward complaining about how Leonardo hogs the blankets at night, Leonardo complaining in turn about how Edward has countless pairs of socks wedged between the bed and the wall. They spend time around eachother like they’re attached to the hip, in perfect synchronization. They’ve memorized each other’s habits and mannerisms, could recognize the other amidst the thickest of crowds, even know how they both organize their clothes- Meticulously, stacking shirts among shirts, pants among pants- Or hardly organizing at all. Though, admittedly, anyone who knows them well enough could know that.

It’s unusual, but they don’t question it, and both are comfortable with this, until Edward remembers and interjects a question into a late-night conversation in their couch fort, the best time for heavy and frivolous topics alike. An unspoken question that always hung between them, but Edward only now had the courage (or the impulsiveness, really) to ask.-

“What are we?”

Leonardo looks to Edward in surprise, trying to work out for the briefest of moments whether this was a reference or a meme or the like, until he sees Edward’s face- His arms may be behind his head in a casual stance, but the brunet only ever stares off like that when he’s thinking, really thinking. And that’s when the blond realizes that he doesn’t quite know what they actually are.

It’s amusing, really, in an odd way. The student leans back to think, tilting his head and putting a hand to his chin, letting out a hum to at least give Edward some sign he heard him- Not that the brunet would need it, anyways.

What _are_ they? Both would want to answer the same thing on impulse, if it were anyone else asking- Best friends, superglue, honey and the bee, inseparable since they can remember. It’s always been _them_ , not Edward _or_ Leonardo; it was always Edward _and_ Leonardo. A package deal, where one goes, the other follows. Just those two in their little couch fort in the dead of night, with only eachother to hear what they have to say through drowsiness and bleary eyes. Shoulders bumping as they playfully shove eachother during Mario Kart, leaning against eachother on especially long and unbearable train rides.

(They could be anything if they wanted to, anything but strangers, really.)

And truth be told, neither of them could truly answer- Leonardo felt his face grow warm at a possibility his mind lingered on for too long, and Edward felt his stomach dissolve into little butterflies, their wingbeats echoing against the inside of his ribcage, fluttering, bubbling forth from an endless wellspring of admiration.

“What _are_ we?” Leonardo finally repeats, quieter, hushed, eyes glinting with worry, even in the shadows cast by the dim light. Edward frowns, bottom lip sticking out as he lets his arms fall to his sides, before ruffling his own hair. A pause follows, a rare one, more tense than usual, before the blond speaks again, a minor rephrasing, but a significant one.

“What do we _want_ to be?”

Edward lets out a little laugh at the question, a little, hearty bark, and Leonardo finds himself mirroring his grin at the silliness of the situation. Edward takes a moment to recover, before replying, leaning towards the blond, letting his head rest on his shoulder like it’s done on so many movie nights before, but to his dismay, the other only stiffens slightly, and his voice drops to little more than a whisper in response.

“This is gonna sound silly.”

Leonardo shakes his head, forcing down the tension in his shoulders, but Edward can still feel it, feel his apprehension in the lines of his figure.

“No, go ahead. I… I want to know. We might _already_ know.”

The brunet lifts his head, and the blond leans back onto the former’s shoulder, eyes closing as his brow furrows, perhaps in frustration. Edward licks his lips, swallows.

“I’m good with this, but, well, sometimes, I just… y’know, stop and _think_.”

Leonardo smiles, relaxes a little more, quips. “Surprising.” The brunet laughs, nudging his partner, before continuing.

“What _would_ I do if we had more?” Edward stops, gently resting his chin on the top of Leonardo’s head, takes a deep breath, taking in the smell of the blond’s shampoo with it- Not his usual lavender-and-conditioner. _Must’ve gotten into mine._ The brunet smiles at the thought, keeps talking, trying to do his best to keep himself from rambling.

“Because sometimes- This might get a lil’ weird- I get this feeling, y’know- It’s warm and fuzzy and it’s whenever I think too long about you- And sometimes- Sometimes I look at your hands and think about how nice it’d be to grab it, run off with you. Go shopping for funny matching shirts while holding hands. Run my hands through your hair. Stupid silly romantic stuff we always see in those dramas and movies. Y’know what I mean?"

There’s no reply at first, but Leonardo hasn’t grown tense again, so Edward lifts his head and cranes his neck to get a glimpse of the other’s face- He pointedly turns away, but the tips of his ears are red. A tiny murmur fills the pause, and the brunet nearly doesn’t catch it, but he does, and he can hear the smile in the blond’s voice.

“God, Ed, I never took you for such a _sap_.”

Edward barks a mock-hurt “hey!” in response, before laughing, and Leonardo joins in, shoulders shaking as giggles spill out from between his fingers- He’s covering his face with his hands, Edward notes, then realizes- He hasn’t gotten an answer yet. The brunet’s chortles ebb away, and while the mirth is still there, along with hope, a flicker of worry remains- Up until Leonardo uncovers his face, cheeks rosy, reminiscent of the time he sunburned really badly- Edward lets out another snicker at the thought.

“I can’t say I object, though- I’d like that too.” Leonardo finally completes, cracking another grin. It’s a bit sleepy, but he’s awake enough to mean this, really _mean_ this- Slender fingers inch forwards to entwine with the other’s, and the blond brings up Edward’s hand, gently pressing his lips to the back of it and letting his eyes flutter shut- The brunet feels his face flare, and he thinks he must be the approximate shade of a brick right now, because holy shit, _what is he doing he’s pretending he’s like some prince or something oh my god this is **happening**_.

They stay like that for a few seconds, before Leonardo moves away, and they stare at eachother for another, slightly awkward moment, noses almost touching, and Edward can feel his face burning up and is almost afraid he’ll literally melt into a tiny puddle right then and there, so he does the first thing that comes to mind to make literally anything happen other than those blue, blue eyes staring at him, searching, sparkling and _illegally pretty_ -

He grabs a cushion from their couch fort and socks Leonardo across the face with it. Softly, but still.

Leonardo lets out a startled yelp, before instinctively grabbing another in retaliation and bonking Edward on the head. Feathers fly, and Edward laughs, a little relieved, and there’s another glint in Leonardo’s eyes now, nothing like the soft admiration, affection from before, rather something amused, if not confused, something Edward’s familiar with- And if he looks close enough, the admiration’s still there. It’s the same, yet different, recognizable, yet new, and Edward takes this to heart, takes it as a good sign, finds comfort in it- Because he’s glad, he’s really, really happy that even with whatever happened just now, things are still somehow normal, that this isn’t some dramatic turning point like it always is when people talk about things like these. He grins, puts down his pillow, feeling his face warm up again, and seriously, it feels like it’s burning with how red it must be, and confesses, before he melts again, be it from the warmth on his cheeks or the way his heartbeat flutters, thunders against his ribcage.

“I love you.”

Leonardo starts a little, hugs his own pillow tight against his chest as his eyes widen, momentarily even more confused than before, then he understands- Neither of them can take back anything anymore, nothing that passed between them can be left behind, forgotten- It’ll all stay the same, but it’ll be different, somehow, and for once, the blond welcomes the change of pace, the steps they’re taking forwards together. He smiles, reaches forwards, brushes the hair out of Edward’s eyes- Maybe his hands are shaking, just a little, but it’s not a bad thing, and he whispers back, fingertips resting against the other’s jaw.

“I love you too.”

**Author's Note:**

> HI IVE BEEN SITTING ON THIS FOR AGES AND IM FINALLY POSTING IT. ITS. SOMETHING, ALRIGHT.
> 
> im ??? abt the flow at some points but this is still the longest thing ive written in a while and actually completed which isnt saying a lot but hey
> 
> anyways, thank you for reading, and i hope you enjoyed! any and all feedback is, as always, greatly appreciated!!


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